A PATTERN LANGUAGE

THE MOVIE THAT IS YOUR LIFE has come about as a result of a collection of all the patterns you have run in the past, including those you are still running today.
A bit like a set of video clips all strung together to form a whole, each video clip is about a particular sector of your life and is added-to each time you give it a thought - of whatever quality.
For example : my life consists of many aspects (sectors of thought that I allow to be in my mind, all of which form my overall pattern of living). These aspects include : --
Family
Partner
Health
Role
Job
Relationships with others
Hobbies
Holidays
Home
And many more………………

All of these aspects have ME in them - how I see ME as part of those “things” or areas of my life. If “I” wasn’t in there somewhere they would not be an “aspect of my mind”.
Each “aspect” can be regarded as running to a pattern - the pattern “I” put on it e.g. my thoughts about “family” are my own - I have my own views, codes of conduct, what is acceptable, needs, etc. Someone else’s thoughts about “family” will be very different so the pattern of thought about ‘family’ for them, the pattern in their life, will be so different and will have a different effect upon the MOVIE which is their LIFE. You could say that my ‘attitude’ about ‘family’ will ‘drive’ the storyline of my life in a way that is linked to that attitude.
If I don’t change my thoughts (attitude or intentions) about my Family Movie Clip, that pattern will carry on as it always did, having the same effect on me and my Life Movie. If however I decide at some stage to change my viewpoint about some aspect of how I regard the ‘Family’ Pattern in my life, then overall, the Main Movie will have a slightly different feeling to it, the storyline will be slightly different.
So we can see that by changing, ever so slightly, our ideas about any of the movie clips, it will alter our Story - a different Movie emerges and plays itself out in front of us.

It’s a case of Managing or Directing your Movie to Produce the life you FEEL INSIDE you are meant to be part of - with you as the principle actor in The Movie Of Your Life.
You can change the script, change the Intention Behind The Story to see a new version of your life’s involvement with the emphasis on a different scene and change the environment you ‘act’ in. And the best thing is that YOU CHOOSE by choice of Intention. You can start to Actively “Take Charge” of your life.
You get to choose at Points in your life - some are more significant points than others. The Big Ones can be used to make completely different Lifestyle Changes. The Smaller Ones are maybe small decisions where minor choices are presented to you as you go along. Just like in a film there are dramatic events and also day-to-day occurrences.

So what is it that determines What is Presented to Us as Individuals?
Well… we certainly don’t have ‘free will’ to do anything we want in life. What we do have are Pre-set Choices as we go along - they are Presented to us in the course of our life. They are preset before we come to earth, each subject that has a choice built into it containing some ‘thing’ or ‘substance’ that we might need to take a close look at, to have the choice to handle it wisely (caringly, bearing in mind the whole of what our choice will affect) or unwisely (un-caringly, bearing in mind the whole of what that decision or choice will affect). And we can consider it or take a preview of it in our future movie in our mind beforehand, which helps us come to our decision, depending on our intention, for the future.
But, you might ask, how can we know at the outset, at the decision time, how ALL will be affected by our ultimate Decision? Well, the sure way to know is to listen to How It Feels to you, for it is by our FEELINGS that we act at all and our feelings are our Inner Guidance System for directing the movie.

So this is THE most important point - we each, as Individuals, have to become used to listening for, hearing and then considering our OWN THOUGHTS and getting used to Acting on Our Feelings as to which way to go. And taking responsibility for such choices.
Our Inner Intelligence is there to guide us - for our benefit. So often we have been taught to listen to the thoughts and ideas of others and act in accordance with what they think is best for us. As individuals, we have to learn, or re-learn how to do this - fully. You may say that you already listen to how things feel and you make your decisions based on your feelings and I would agree with you…….. but it’s only up to a point for most of us. There are many aspects of our lives where we are blindly following what we were taught by our forebears without realising it. So it is a case of measuring each aspect of our life with our own common sense and true personal feelings, in detail.

We can so easily get our life, or one aspect of it, into some kind of MUDDLE. Firstly we have to become clear about how we can get ourselves out of this Muddle!
Is this muddle affecting how your movie is turning out? If you could change One Aspect Of Your Movie would you get a “clearer picture”, a more interesting Storyline with yourself enjoying playing that Leading Role?

You play that Leading Role (You in Your Movie) regardless of the script and characters in it, but you do have some Input as you Direct and Produce the clips, the Aspects that fit into the Whole. Open up to your Choices, see them in the clear light of awareness (about yourself) and know that YOU have a Choice and Choices!

HOW DO WE DECIDE IF OUR LIFE IS IN A MUDDLE?! Aren’t we supposed (by fate or just accidental circumstances) to have unpleasant things happen to us during our life and we just have to cope? Well, we definitely will always have CHALLENGES - these are intertwined with the CHOICE-thing again. But if we listen to our own individual feelings when anything crops up and be guided by our Senses (as opposed to uncontrolled Emotions) we will begin to see more clearly What Path is Best For Us to Take.
Take the emotion out of it first, listen to finer senses and go by our own feelings, trust them, trust that our Inner Intelligence is Guiding Us For The Best (even in the face of protests from others).
Your Life, your Movie, is for YOU to live in the best possible way for your own Evolution as a Being. You cannot direct other peoples’ movies. Only they can do that for themselves. You have to see what is happening in Your Own Life Movie and be Director and Producer of your own Film. You and only You have direct Responsibility for Your Own Movie.
You Are Your Own Movie Maker
Make use of whatever comes along to help you in your Production (which doesn’t mean taking advantage of people to their detriment.)
YOUR MIND CAN HEAL YOUR MOVIE
You didn’t intentionally set out to make a muddle of your movie! But it is by your indirect choices taken along the way in the decision-making process that resulted in you arriving at this point in your Movie (Life) with the current storyline, characters and scenes.
You were not taught that you could have INFLUENCE on how your part “panned out”. You definitely have CERTAIN INFLUENCE over what you EXPERIENCE.
Primarily, the watching (and involvement in) a Film or Movie is an EXPERIENCE. Sometimes good, sometimes not so good, dependent on many aspects of how this film ACCORDS with our Deeply Held (and often hidden) VALUES we hold to ourselves.

So now we come to THE METHOD, the ASSESSMENT of our own life and take a look at the way we can actually make those changes we would wish to see in the storyline.
We need to begin the process of assessing each Aspect of Our Life against the CRITERIA WE WOULD PREFER to be the prominent factors running (in the background) our LIFE’S EXPERIENCE as seen in the Movie happening in front of our eyes.
This is the critical next stage and is one that necessarily takes us into many, many Aspects of Life - all for us to CONSIDER and ADD or REMOVE those little programs that are part of the whole Production.




LIFE [MOVIE] SELF ASSESSMENT

What is contained in our LIFE ASSESSMENT QUESTIONAIRE?

Firstly – Ask yourself “What is the overall feeling that you get when you think of yourself in your life? Put your feeling on a scale of 1-10 where 10 is wonderful and 0 is dreadful;
Secondly – Is There One Main Factor that stands out as being the worst part of your life, the generator of most of your unwanted displeasure, OR are there a few (or even all) aspects of your life that are creating these feelings. Identify them and write them down. Score them from bad to worse.
Thirdly - Take the One Main Aspect above (or the worst) and write down what you think is causing the unpleasant feelings, being totally honest. Describe it, say why and write a FEELING WORD for it.
[Out of your descriptions, key words will appear; these will indicate the opposite of what you value in life (the qualities that would make your life feel comfortable if you had them all the time). Keep these key words in a separate list for later.]
Fourthly – Carry out the same process for each aspect of your life (movie) and keep adding to your list.
Fifthly – Take a look at what makes you ANGRY in your life - what situations keep cropping up which repeatedly make you annoyed and trigger frustration or rage or even just mild irritation. Describe these as before and extract the key words you write down. Again, the opposites of these key words will indicate what you would prefer to have in your life (movie).
Sixthly – Now something bright for a change! Take a look at those Aspects of your Life that you really feel COMFORTABLE and HAPPY with. Write a list of descriptions and words and extract once again KEY WORDS that describe your BEST LIFE EXPERIENCES (those you would most like to see continuing in the movie.) Add these to your earlier list and see how it grows.
Seventhly - This list of your VALUES is important to bear in mind in the following stages of your Movie Production. They are what would make your movie a happy one to watch.
Eighthly - Now, take THE main Aspect of your Life and put a Title to it e.g. “the job I am in”, “the relationship I am in”, “the lack of money I have”, etc. Now just ponder on all the events and decisions you have made through your life regarding this one aspect only and write briefly the choices you made which led to today’s Movie Clip about that subject. See all these occurrences as a mini-movie in itself, separate from all other parts of your life. See yourself and anyone else who would have been influential in the making of this mini-movie and most importantly assess your own feelings, motives, reactions, emotions and requirements or wants at the time (or just before) of you making those decisions. You must be BRUTALLY HONEST with yourself especially about what you thought you would get out of doing this next thing, taking this next decision.
REMEMBER - nothing in your life ‘JUST HAPPENS’ by ‘ACCIDENT’ or ‘OUT OF THE BLUE’. Everything comes about for a reason.
Once you have gone through this process you will have the ability to run through that mini-movie in your mind and watch what was happening. Go into a quiet space and relax ready to watch your mini-movie. It may be quite long or quite short but try to watch the whole thing from beginning to end and you may wish to put a mental commentary to it in your mind. WATCH OUT for any part of your mini-movie that you want to avoid watching and experiencing. Make a note of it and see what it is that you want to avoid looking at -- it may be an Aspect of yourself you would rather not admit to and it’s VERY IMPORTANT.
It is these HIDDEN PARTS OF WHO WE REALLY ARE that are the basis of what motivated you to do whatever you didn’t want to see, and we need to get to the bottom of what that reveals about a side of your personality that created part of your mini-movie following that period or choice.
SO HERE WE HAVE IT - the crux of what started to appear in your mini-movie from then on - THE MOTIVATING ATTITUDE about SOMETHING - and it is this MOTIVATING ATTITUDE that we need to GRASP HOLD OF, OBSERVE HOW IT CAME ABOUT IN US, see WHAT WE WOULD LIKE INSTEAD and SET IT AS ONE OF THE REVISED MOTIVATORS in the new Mini-Movie - i.e. apply it to this aspect of our life when a choice appears in relation to this subject.

‘C’ is for CHANGE and change requires EFFORT on your part, on the part of each of us.

Only you can do this and it does take quite a bit of effort, especially at first, because our habitual ways of thinking are so ingrained through years of using the same patterns of thought in similar situations that to observe “how we are”, on the run, needs control and relaxation when we might be used to being out of control (reacting automatically in a situation) and tense (intolerant due to resentment or fear or anger, etc.).
But it can be done once you accept the Power You Have as an Individual. You are a member of the human race, a huge collective; yet, you are also an Independent Thought-processing Individual. We have been taught to rely on things ‘out there’ to make us feel good (or bad) yet once we realise that we can Empower Ourselves to feel okay and balanced and clear NO MATTER WHAT then we have reached a point where we can make the difference we really wish to see in our life (Movie). This is the point where we take responsibility.

THEN WE GET TO THE STICKY BITS in our Movie where we observe that an “unavoidable thing” happened to us (e.g. “I fell off a ladder, broke my ankle and have had pain for the last two years because of it” , or “my house was flooded in the storms when the nearby river burst its banks”. “I couldn’t do anything about that, could I? It was just an accident, out of my control!”
These type of ‘occurrences’ are just as important to look at because in each case there would have been a Series of Smaller Events in your movie that led up to this “catastrophic event” and it will take some degree of looking at, as with our previous exercise. Once again it is not simply “what happened” (external event) that we look at, it’s also, and most importantly, WHAT WE WERE THINKING ABOUT OR IGNORING AT THE TIME IT HAPPENED OR IN THE PERIOD PREVIOUS TO IT (hours, weeks, months, years) and the ‘type’ or ‘quality’ of thoughts those were.
Mostly we remember ‘the event’ (dramatic) and forget the thoughts in the previous seconds or minutes or weeks (subtle), because we are not taught to look for such links. But it is these thoughts and the previous FEELINGS, EMOTIONS, JUDGEMENTS, INTOLERANCES, WANTS, REPULSIONS, ETC. that are VITAL even though they were subtle.
They are vital because they are the type or quality of thoughts that are not doing you any good in your life - they are coarse - your Inner Intelligence is trying to awaken you that your continued use of such thoughts or thought patterns will create and intensify a quality of life (Movie) that will be uncomfortable to watch and be part of -- because in that moment you are actually going against the TRUE VALUES you would most prefer as the background motivators that your Life Force can use to your best advantage (for the most appropriate Movie for you). You may have taken on a particular way of thinking (copied from those around you, perhaps, or as you were ‘taught’ by your family or friends) which is ACTUALLY NOT WHO YOU REALLY ARE, i.e. YOU ARE GOING AGAINST YOUR TRUE SELF, AGAINST YOUR BETTER NATURE - the REAL YOU. And your Inner Guidance System is giving you a nudge about the consequences of carrying on in that vein.

IN THAT MOMENT, YOU DID NOT LISTEN AND TAKE HEED (change) and as a CONSEQUENCE OF CARRYING ON USING THOSE THOUGHTS an “Accident” occurred and then you had to bear the brunt of it. A ‘big event’, because you were not listening to the little nudges. Previous to this big event, though, there would have been more subtle events to draw your attention to this way of thinking (your Intelligence doesn’t actually want you to suffer BIG TIME, it gives you lots of simple messages before that stage is reached. We have become so UNUSED TO LISTENING TO OUR SUBTLE INNER FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS that habitually we just ‘plough on’ and the Movie unfolds its Storyline in what we begin to see could have been on a different tack had we known earlier “how to do it”.

In a lot of cases ACCEPTANCE of our CURRENT SITUATION is what we need instead of the ‘wanting’ things to be different instantly. THEN we need to ACCEPT that we are not stuck in our way of thinking, in our Movie’s Storyline, but that we are ABLE to MAKE DEGREES OF CHANGE.

Obviously we can’t go back. Regret and feelings of self pity, anger, guilt,, etc. will just keep us where we are now. These new realisations and the making of time and effort to look at ourselves HONESTLY are the first small steps that we can take - if we choose to.
IT IS OUR FREE CHOICE
It is up to us as Individuals
No-one else can do it for us
Pressure groups for change in external circumstances will not change the part in us that needs a better-feeling life movie. Our own Life Movie is unique to each of us. We are the only ones who are capable of feeling what it is like to be us. SO WE MAY AS WELL TRY TO MAKE THE BEST MOVIE WE ARE GIVEN THE CAPABILITY OF BECOMING - we are the ones who benefit. By acting out our true values in the course of our Life Movie we will begin to attract similar ‘matching’ value-based situations into our life.

In all of these exercises it is vital that any feelings that you would prefer must be based on what you want for your existence in this lifetime. If you base them on what you think others expect of you then you will be living a lie and will continue to make parts of your Life Movie like a Horror Film.

Live Your Truth
Be your own Film Director
Produce a wonderful Movie of Your Own Life

Put your name in the credits…

YOU -- THE MOVIE MAKER